Missing our Tradition when we go to live in a foreign country.

[Padmanabhan.J]

What we miss when we go to live with our/ daughters in a foreign country?

The first causality whenever one visits to any foreign country is “bird feeding’, not only that, one would also miss, crows incessant cawing announcing that the day has began, subtle cycle bell sound indicating the milk man is dropped his sachets in the bag that hangs outside the doors in some homes, in some places one can even hear a “KoZhi Kuvooal” and a distant Express Rail running sound are also the casualty. If it is the month of January (Tamil month Markazhi) Temple loud speakers start blaring devotional music.

Back in India, the first thing I do in the morning is to feed crows with bread slices and opening a window in the Kitchen and later on, after cooking is over, my wife is to feed the crows with cooked hot rice and a small quantity of Paruppu. That is the way our elders have taught us .This is definitely not possible if one is visiting any western country.

I will tell you a small story from the great Epic of Mahabharata Karnan was one who gave a lot in charity. He would give away anything--diamond, gold, and money, vessels, whatever--that was sought from him. After giving up his life in the battle, he went to the svargam (heavens). He was hungry. Surrounding him were vessels made of diamond, and gold. But there was not a fistful of cooked rice or a cup of water. "Why is this so?” he asked of the assistants there. "You were a Dana sura (sun of charity), no doubt. You gave away lots in gold and silver. But then you did not do any Anna danam (charity of food)? Only what you gave there will yet get here", they said. Karnan felt humiliated. This dharma sukmma (subtlety of dharma) went unknown to him. So he got permission from Yamadharmaraja to come back to this Bhoolokam during Mahalaya Patcha days and did anna dhanam to all for 14 days and went back and he was given food thereafter.

Coming to my topic, If I throw bread slices or put hot rice outside the home either in UK or US, (even if I am allowed) surprisingly we won’t find any crows to feed on them, Even if they are there, I am sure that they will not relish hot rice sadam with paruppu .

Any comment please?

[ramanuja]

Re: Missing our Tradition when we go to live in a foreign country.

The culture lives only if we follow. The local folks here fill a container with birds seeds for birds in winter time outside the house. The birds come and eat the seeds. During navarathri, we have kolu at home and at temples. People invite others to home during kolu and give thampoolam, sundal and gifts. During dhanur masam some temples open at 5 AM with suprabatham and Andal's Tiruppavai, Tirupalliyezhuchi are recited and Pongal prasadams distributed at 6.15 AM. The temperature will be in around zero degree celcius in the early hours in Dhanur masam. Vaikunta Ekadasi, Azhvar Tirunakshatrams are also celebrated at some temples in United States.At some temples Tiruvadyayana utsavams (reciting nalayiram divya prabandam) are celebrated with culmination of nammAzhvar moksham. Our traditions live only in abroad.

[Brahmanyan]

Re: Missing our Tradition when we go to live in a foreign country.

Dear Sri Padmanabhan,

The saying " when in Rome live as the Romans do" holds good.

When we go out of our home land we cannot follow our tradition as we did at home. But we can follow what ever possible within the available means, perhaps in a restricted way. I have no experience of living in UK or USA or other countries where liberal democracies function. But I have lived in the Sultanate of Oman for eight years, with freedom available for an expatriate . But allowed enough freedom to practice our religious activities within the four walls of our residence without disturbance to others. As most of our traditions are linked to our religious belief, we may have to be careful in practicing our traditional activities like Bhajans and Kirthans.

Culture is continuous refinement of traditions conditioned by the society where we live in. This change cannot be stopped. If we look at our own families we will understand the changes that had taken place within three generations that we know. Our dress, personal makeup, language of communication, eating habits, social mix-up, and every other thing have changed beyond recognition. But there are some basic virtues imbibed in our tradition like simple living, politeness, helping the needy and feeding the guests that can be followed an where we live.

Regards,
Brahmanyan,
Bangalore.

[Priya Radhi]

Re: Missing our Tradition when we go to live in a foreign country.

I fully support the message put forward by sri ramanuja. Even within our India, we are not able to follow our practices, if we move out of our state, due to other compulsions. My cousin, who is around 35 years old and a nuclear professor in US, is fully changed to what he was while in India. He has undergone 'baraniyasam' and recites vishnu sahasranamam every day and informed that they have a group of eminent vaishnavites who are holding higher position in US, who assemble every weekend and recite it in rotation in the members house. Also they celebrate the festivals with more fervor and speak in tamil in the house, so that the children can remember their mothertongue.
ஸ்ரீமான் NVS அவர்களின் விளக்கம் மிகவும் பொருத்தமானதாகவும்
விவேகத்துடனம் இருந்தது கண்டு மகிழ்ச்சி
எல்லாவற்றுக்கும் பழக்கமே காரணம்

[Padmanabhan.J]

Re: Missing our Tradition when we go to live in a foreign country.

I have never written that " in UK or in USA we are not allowed", my point is we really miss some of our regular routine when we go to live in these foreign countries.

[nvr venkat]

Re: Missing our Tradition when we go to live in a foreign country.

Most of the points were valid and there is nothing to debate. People who live in UK, USA or other foreign countires they follow our tradition more what a vaishnavite follow in India with full srithai. First of all people in India don't get time, too much stress on work, traffic, TV Serial other family and friends business. Whereas here we visit temple without fail atleast once a week, try to do some service either to the community or @ temple. Take part in some sort of charity work which involve many people from the community for the cause of good. I am writing this from the experience where I live. We celebrate all functions [Pandigai] with family and friends @ home and also in temple with the full community in a grand manner. We have only few temples so we make sure atleast we take part in one of the utsavams or acharayan thiru nakshtrams or kalyna utsavams. Also we speak TAMIL when we meet any Tamil friends. The above is all from the experience of Working class. sorry for any inconvenience if I heart any one. JAI HIND!!!!!!

[Padmanabhan.J]

Re: Missing our Tradition when we go to live in a foreign country.

Dear Sir
Probably my points are misunderstood, i move between UK and US very often; coming to my write up about 'Missing our Tradition", yes, we definitely miss our regular routines like feeding crow with hot rice and Paruppu before anyone is served food; we also miss all those early morning birds sound announcing that the day has began, subtle cycle bell sound indicating the milk man is dropped his sachets in the bag that hangs outside the doors in some homes.

[Priya Radhi]

Re: Missing our Tradition when we go to live in a foreign country.

All of you, in this thread, have the opportunity to visit abroad and stay abroad [of course me excluded]. Definitely you would have had varied experiences.
Surely we cannot have everything all the time and all the things every time.
My respects to all and I have no intention to impress anyone with my words. Just a thought, that is all. All elders please forgive me, if I hurt anyone.
Thank you all

[Padmanabhan.J]

Re: Missing our Tradition when we go to live in a foreign country.

Respected Priya Radhi
You are absolutely right; no hurt feeling whatsoever.
When we go and live in far off places, we definitely miss our very close relatives, birthday functions, upanayanams, marriages etc.
Although medical facility is far advanced in UK/US, the cost of treatment is prohibitive even with cover of medical insurance; in Chennai one can find a Doctor sitting in a clinic and a boy giving tokens for first come basis, and within a reasonable time you may be able to see your doctor, and the treatment cost is manageable.

For older people, when they fall sick in a foreign place, it is better to rush back to India/to their city and get proper treatment.

[Priya Radhi]

Re: Missing our Tradition when we go to live in a foreign country.

Respected sir:
You are absolutely right. I hear from my relatives who are in Australia, USA and UK that one cannot visit the doctor at their choice. I used to wonder how their country men cope up with such situations.
Even when one of my older relative when he was in USA, though his son is a Doctor, he was advised to rush to INdia for certain health problems for immediate treatment and that too in reasonable charge.
I agree with you fully and here I would like to share my father's habit He was a station master and used to have night duties. The sound of trains passing through the station, the clanking of block instruments, the messages from the cabin personnel were all stayed with him in his entire service.
The result was, after his retirement he could not have proper sleep, though the house was quiet and since he was accustomed to the habit of remaining awake in night and having intermittent sleep, sleep in the day after night duty, his retired days were very hard. Most of the days he did not have sleep
Habits are very hard to change or to get rid off.